I think I am having extended PMS. Temper hasn't been good lately plus moody and depressed. Aunt Flo is one week late, and I wonder if it's due to the stress recently or irregular schedule, or...Haha hopefully not other possible reasons that I dread!

I have been attention seeking lately, msn-ing friends to chat and pouring my woes to them. Three cheers to msn for letting me venting out my frustrations to my friends so I don't get so bottled up and end up screaming like a mad woman at home. The kids are sensing my temper and are giving me a much harder time at home. Hao has been testing my patience, and Ee has been sticking to me like a superglue, demanding my 101% attention, leaving me no time or patience to deal with Hao. I feel so dejected like a failure. Such a bad mother I am. Why Why Why can't I give more TLC to them instead of screaming my head off at home. I need an outlet. Maybe I am too bottled up. I need to release the tension in me somehow. Maybe crying will help, but I can't seem to find the tears!!! Exercise? No time... Shopping? No money... URGH!!! Msn-ing and blogging have became my best friends. Sigh...how pathetic. I am such a failure.

Must thank Eileen for giving me good advice this morning. She's my best pillar of support in recent years. We've been through much and shared a lot of things. We encouraged each other to be a better mother and give the best we can to our kids. She told me a lot this morning and both our resolution for the new year is to control our temper more when communicating with our kids. Afterall, they are just kids!!! How can we expect them to listen to us when they are so naive and ignorant right? This strong fact always slipped our mind when we demand obedience from our kids. We should think more like them when communicating with them. Being parents nowadays is not easy feat at all. It's even more challenging than working or running a company! At least u can get guidance when you are working. Minding kids are all so challenging as there's no guidelines and no 2 kids are the same! Basically we have to have our unique way of handling each kid. Aiyo!!! Headache!!!